Sincerest Condolences: What To Write In A Sympathy Card

By Ali + Julie on 4 Apr 2023

Not surprisingly, the passing of a family member or close friend rank among the most stressful life events.

If you know someone who’s experienced this tragedy, you might feel stressed by the thought of writing a condolence card.

What do you say when someone has died? How can you find the right words to express your sympathy? And what if you’re given the task of arranging flowers or sympathy messages from a whole group?

Read on for the answers.


Sympathy messages will vary depending on the circumstances and how well you knew the person. “Sorry for your loss” is always appropriate, but what if you knew the person, sharing an incite or memory of that person can be of comfort.

Here are some sample ideas to guide you.


  • Wishing you as much peace as possible through this difficult time.
  • You and your family are in our daily thoughts and prayers.
  • I hope you feel surrounded by love and compassion. My thoughts are with you.
  • “It is not the length of life, but the depth of life.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson)


Another way to express condolences is to assure the bereaved that their loved one was special - not only to them, but also to you.

Here are some ideas to get you started.

  • Remembering your wonderful mother and wishing you comfort.
  • It was a pleasure knowing Jane. She was a beautiful person, inside and out. I remember when ….
  • What an amazing man who lived a truly remarkable life. I’m lucky to have known him. He taught me ….
  • I hope it brings you comfort to know that I’m celebrating the life Bill lived and I’m grateful for the positive impact he made on mine.
  • Your father touched so many lives for the good. His legacy will never be forgotten. He helped people by …


Your friend will likely need help in the weeks and months following the funeral. To help a friend in need, include a kind offer in your card (and be sure to follow up). It’s better to offer and do something than just offer a hollow “anything I can do”.

  • I can’t take your pain away, but I can offer a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on.
  • You have so much on your mind right now. I’m happy to pick up groceries or walk the dog for as long as you want me to.
  • It’s been a while, but I know the hurt doesn’t fully go away. I’m still here whenever you need me.
  • Christmas won’t be the same without Joe, but I hope it helps to know you’re in our thoughts through the holiday season.


It’s never easy finding the right words when you’re consoling somebody.

If you’re stumped about what to write on your condolence card, refer back to the list of ideas above. One of them might be just the thing your friend needs to hear!

Are you organizing flowers, a gift, or a collection of sympathy messages? With GroupTogether, you can all chip in for a gift with a card that includes everyone’s messages.

A gift & card from your group

Send your sympathies with a thoughtful card and gift from everyone. Chip in with friends or colleagues and give one gift they'll really appreciate.

Ali Julie Square

Ali + Julie

Co-Founders, GroupTogether

Life’s busy. That’s why we’re here to make it easy for you to collect money from a group. Less wasted time, less packaging waste, and spending a little less but giving a lot better!

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