Ever heard someone say “Call me if there’s anything I can do”? I’m sure they meant it, but who actually calls and says “Can you come over and remove the lice from my older child’s curly hair while I breastfeed twins, and yeah… we’re out of bread”.

The better way is to offer specific ways you would gladly help, or offer a few gift ideas that everyone could chip in for that will be really appreciated, and let her choose. Then, keep on texting, calling, and offering till she accepts.

Here are our top 10 ideas to give meaningfully in the first few months:

1. It’s all about sleep!

For mum as much as the baby. Organise a night nurse or an offer to rock the baby to sleep to give mum a break.

2. Ask her.

People have quite set ideas about what they want for their first child – only organic, only pastels, no plastic, no screens, their decor, etc. If you can get an idea of what they want, it’s so much better to give a gift they’ll really appreciate.

3. A little gift for the other child?

NOT DRUMS! Ideally, something that will keep them busy without the mum helping.

4. Spend time with the mum (not just the baby).

Ask how she is doing. Keep doing this after the excitement of the first few weeks.

5. Deliver food.

For the rest of the family or for mum or for baby’s first food is a godsend.

6. It’s expensive!!!!

If you’re not the best friend, give them an eGift Card…

7. Send encouragement just because.

It could be as simple as a text message telling her she’s an awesome mum.

8. If you’re a close friend, do something helpful.

It might be as simple as hanging out the washing or dropping off a few groceries on the way past.

9. Give her ‘me’ time.

A gift card to get a massage or facial is a great excuse for some 'me' time. Offer to look after the baby for an hour while she relaxes.

10. A gift for mum.

She will have received so many pairs of booties and gifts for the baby, so think about something you could bring for her instead. A gorgeous robe and pyjama set is practical but will make her feel special.